I've lived in a world of “if only’s”.. if only I had blonde hair, I’d be attractive. if only I had a smaller stomach, I’d have a perfect body. if only I had a 'wild personality', I'd be more wanted. if only, if only... the list could go on. My way of thinking has been toxic. So when I get compliments, I don't take them well. It's a dangerous place to live, not loving how you look. Yes, my stomach is big, but that's because I haven't cared for the body that I was given. It's not because 'being smaller' wasn't in the cards for me. My hair is brunette and not blonde, but guess what, brunette's are HOTT. Yes, my personality is calm, but there is a wildness in me and if you're lucky you will see it and not only will you see it, you will love it. I am more than I see me for. More than you see me for. There is a fear of true transparency for me, especially when it comes to my body. A fear of showing up raw, unfiltered and being vulnerable. Fear of someone critiquing and picking apart my body or the way that I look. Because of this, I'm guilty of adding filters to photos and finding the 'perfect angle'. Truth is though when it comes to my body no one sees my flaws as much as I do. Out of 100 photos there will always be something that I want to 'hide' and this isn't love for myself. This behavior isn't healthy no matter who you see doing it. It’s hard to remember this sometimes. But remembering who I am and how God made me, is what life should be about. Your true beauty expands far past the eyes of others, not the other way around. True Beauty Lies Within All Of Us
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AuthorExplore the depths of emotions, feelings and thoughts, through raw, honest, and unapologetic expression in poetry, prose and blog form. Archives
June 2024
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